When I reflect on my past experiences with celibacy, I do so with great respect for those who choose this path. In an earlier chapter of my life, I practised celibacy for several years out of respect for a deeply religious partner. At the time, I believed it was the right thing to do. I wanted to honour her beliefs, and I thought our love and connection would carry us through any challenge—even if it meant putting off something as natural as sexual intimacy.
Looking back now, after seven years of dating and entering a marriage, I can confidently say that celibacy has more downsides than benefits. While it was a gesture of love and respect, it also had the unintended consequence of masking deeper issues that would eventually surface. Celibacy, in my experience, can hide significant sexual incompatibilities. This is something I learned the hard way after waiting seven long years to find out that my partner and I were not sexually compatible.
As someone who has walked this road, I now advocate for the importance of sexual intimacy in a relationship. Sex is an essential part of human connection, and while I’m not suggesting anyone rush into it, I believe it’s crucial to engage in sexual activity after a mutually agreeable period of time—whether that’s a few weeks or months. Waiting too long, as I did, may mean you’re left facing hard truths about your compatibility that you could’ve discovered earlier.
It’s not just about the physical aspect, either. Sexual compatibility contributes to emotional closeness, understanding, and long-term happiness in ways that celibacy can obscure. So, my advice is simple: don’t wait seven years like I did. It’s essential to try before you buy because ensuring every aspect of your relationship works—including your sex life—will set the foundation for a healthier, more fulfilling partnership.
Discover more from Michael Forman – Author of Dark Fiction & Drama
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.