I love my little Singaporean friend, Lizzy. She’s crazy. She’s mad about fish… and men. At 44 and recently divorced, she’s living the life she didn’t get before she got married. People half her age would be envious. She’s adventurous, confident, alive and free to explore everything and anything she likes — anyone she likes.
So it was that she explored a guy’s profile pic and was besotted, not of him but of the large rock cod he showed off in his outstretched hands. She decided there and then that this was a guy worth knowing.
Lizzy is my hero. Regrets don’t exist. She dates men and makes equitable trades with them. It’s a bold approach. I couldn’t do it. One thing is sure, there are no mind games with my friend Lizzy. She says exactly what she wants. The guys don’t seem to mind because every lover becomes a lasting friend (almost). It’s a refreshingly different way to meet people. I love her openness. I wish I could be more like her and see those opportunities.
Fish guy was one of those spontaneous opportunities waiting to be had.
Lizzy went to get herself a drink at the bar and struck up a conversation with a guy who was next in line. She noticed he was looking at his phone and saw the picture displayed on it. “That’s a nice fish,” she said with her usual smile. Before their conversation was over, they had friended each other on social media. She went back to her date and he went off to meet with friends. They didn’t communicate again until the night was almost over. Her date had moved on and fish was on her mind. The night ended with luscious sex and a sweet promise from the stranger. Lizzy was to get a big fish from him after his next fishing trip.
I kinda like deals like these. There’s something wonderfully grounding about them. Sex is fleeting but exchanging things harvested from mother earth takes the focus off the fuck while taking responsibility for it. It forces us to go back to each other afterwards to share these tokens and make good on our promises. It’s small but a powerfully strong thing.
And Lizzy was adamant about receiving her special token from the sea. She was going to make sure he kept his word.
“Have you heard from fish guy?” I asked.
“I texted him. He’s at work.”
“When does he fly back home?”
“He’ll return in a few weeks. He said he’ll get me one when he gets back.”
“You really think he’ll pay up?”
“Why wouldn’t he? He said he’d get me fish.”
God, I love her optimism.
Work rosters put mine personnel onsite for three weeks at a time and then they break for a well-earned one-week holiday. This is when they get to let their hair down and ski, skydive or fish to their heart’s content.
“Did you see fish guy this week?”
“He arrived yesterday and said he wanted to see me but I reminded him. I said to him: No fish, no date.”
“You didn’t see him?”
She smiled. “He promised fish. I wait for fish.”
Clearly, fish guy got ahead of himself. Lizzy liked the guy but wasn’t prepared to extend his credit. She was due a fish. He appreciated her honesty. No offence was taken. The fish would come to her on his next break.
Another three weeks passed and his plane touched down on one misty morning in June.
“Has fish guy texted you this week?”
“Of course.”
“Did he get you your fish?”
“He said he had one in the freezer.”
“So, you’re square now?”
“He promised fresh fish. I’m not taking frozen fish!”
My recollection was tested. She never said fresh to me. It was just fish. Then again, I wasn’t there when they made their deal… and I’m not Asian. When I think about it now, it kinda makes sense — an Asian woman who saw fresh fish in a man’s hand would expect the same in return. Lizzy wouldn’t settle for frozen offcuts. She’d want a whole fish with big bright eyes, fins, a tail and every scale left on its fresh fishy body.
Fish guy had his orders and I could just imagine how his ears interpreted them: “You didn’t get a frozen fuck dickhead. Get me a proper fresh fish you pathetic c*nt!” Of course, men have short memories and three weeks is a long time.
Social media doesn’t lie. A guy who loves fishing will show the world when he catches the next big one. Lizzy saw the updated profile pic: “Hey! Where’s my fish mate?”
“Lizzy? Umm, yeah I got one… look, I’m about to fly out. If you want fish, you’ll have to wait when I get back.”
“When are you leaving?”
“I’m flying out now.”
“Need a lift?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“I come get you. Get me fish and I take you airport.”
“You… you want my fish?”
“My fish. You catch another one. We good? Okay?”
She’s brazen. I’ll give her that. Fish guy was in credit and she offered him a free ride. It made him look cheap.
“Yeah, okay, no problem.”
Lizzy got her fish and she said it was yummy. I think she’ll date fish guy again soon.
–Michael.
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