As I sit down to write this letter, my heart is heavy with conflicting emotions. For two years, you have been my muse, my inspiration, and so much more. Your beauty, both inside and out, has ignited a fire within me, driving my passion for photography to new heights. I’ve captured every curve and every angle of your being, not just with my camera but with my heart.
I still remember the distance that existed between us when we began. You stood beneath the studio lights while I hid behind the camera, pretending the lens made everything simple. I told myself I was studying light, shape and shadow. I watched for the smallest change in your expression and waited for the moment when you forgot I was there. Somewhere among those quiet moments, I stopped seeing you as a subject and began seeing you as the woman I could no longer remove from my thoughts.
But as much as I’ve cherished our time together, I find myself facing a crossroads I never imagined I would encounter. I’ve realised that my feelings for you have transcended the boundaries of professionalism. I’ve fallen deeply in love with you, Sarah, and it’s tearing me apart.
You’ve become the source of my creative energy, the muse who fuels my artistry. But you’re also the woman who has captured my heart in a way I never thought possible. I’ve measured your body from top to toe, not just with my lens but with the tender touch of a lover. Our intimate moments together have been etched into my soul, leaving an indelible mark I can’t shake.
When you leave the studio, the silence changes. The room is still filled with you: the warmth where you stood, the photographs waiting to be developed. I stay there, looking at images I already know by heart, and wonder how I can return to my former life and pretend none of this happened.
Yet I’m torn between two worlds. On one hand, I have Samantha, my wife, the woman who has stood by my side through thick and thin. She’s been my rock, my confidante, my partner in life. She trusts the life we built because I gave her every reason to.
On the other hand, there’s you, Sarah: the embodiment of passion and desire, the woman who makes me feel alive in ways I never thought possible. With you, I don’t feel as though I’m simply moving through another organised day. Time slips. Rules soften. The man I have kept contained begins to breathe.
I’ve weighed the pros and cons endlessly, trying to rationalise my feelings and make sense of this impossible situation. But the more I compare being a faithful husband with being a creative lover, the more I realise how painful choosing is. Every imagined future leaves someone wounded. No honest path through this lets us all walk away untouched.
Perhaps that is what frightens me most. This confession exposes the darkness hiding in plain sight inside a man everyone believes they know. I have smiled, worked and returned home while carrying another life within me. I told myself silence was kindness, but silence has only allowed the lie to grow.
In the end, I can’t deny what my heart truly desires. I can’t continue pretending that my feelings for you are anything less than they are. I know what I must do, even if it means shattering the life I’ve built with Samantha.
I’ve made my decision, Sarah. I choose you. I choose us. I choose love, even if it means facing the consequences of my actions. I can’t imagine a future without you by my side, sharing our passion for art and each other. I want mornings when I don’t have to watch you leave and evenings when your name is not something I must keep locked behind my teeth.
I know this won’t be easy. There will be pain, anger and heartache. People will judge us, and perhaps they will be right to do so. I cannot ask Samantha to understand, nor can I expect forgiveness for the hurt I’m about to cause. All I can do is stop pretending and accept the cost of the truth.
So, my beautiful muse, I ask you to take my hand and run away with me. Let’s leave behind the lives that require us to hide and embrace the freedom of our love. I don’t know where the road will take us. I only know I want to face it with you.
With all my heart,
Download eBook Now or Get Paperback Here
SEETHINGS II follows the return of the Storm Killer as a body on a secluded beach in Moreton Bay, igniting fear and denial. While police dismiss the link, the media doesn’t. Mitchell Felding forms a dangerous bond with a man who understands his darkest impulses. When Natasha enters his life, carrying love letters from her murdered mother, intimacy deepens, and truth closes in. Some futures are inherited. Some have escaped.
SEETHINGS (first in the series) is downloadable and free for a limited time here.
Discover more from Michael Forman – Author of Dark Fiction & Drama
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.