Would you cheat if your husband told you, after two years of no sex, that you could?
I’ve been trying to do too many things this week — more meetings than usual, making myself finally write a speech I’m giving next week, making Charlotte dinner/Nutella sandwiches — and generally moving too quickly through things.
So it is like a nice little codependent-sponsored break when I get your questions and actually take a moment to focus solely on what’s going on with you and not be so scattered with my own crap.
For the following question, however, I don’t have the long-term monogamy credentials to give this reader all the advice she deserves. If you do, I’d love for you to help her out in the comments. Thanks in advance.
If you’re feeling very Zen and have no answers but only questions, text them to me at 917-239-2891. My phone is fully charged, which is rare, so let’s all take advantage!
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I would say no. I think that sex is a form of intimacy, but when a relationship has become sexless it’s actually the intimacy that is missing more than the sex (the sex is just the part you notice the most). So “opening up” the relationship really doesn’t accomplish much. It provides a sexual outlet maybe, but what’s the point if you are still going home to a relationship with no intimacy?
My 2 cents is, the intimacy has to come from the marriage. If it’s not, and you are unable to work on it, then the marriage with either fail or become very lifeless. Throwing sex with other people into the mix only adds fuel to an already bad situation.
I agree with you if the couple have no kids.
I have an open marriage and we work well in so many aspects….we like a brother and sister and it is really okay for now.
We do still enjoy each others company so everything really depends on the situation.
If we didn’t have kids and houses and mortgages maybe….but for now, we are just happy like this. X