Some conversations never quite get started. We ask a question, but instead of an answer, we get a change of subject, a laugh, a deflection, or just silence.
People avoid certain topics all the time, and the reasons can be as varied as the subjects themselves. But how can we tell when someone’s dodging a conversation, and should we press on or let it go?
The signs of avoidance are usually subtle. Shifting eye contact, nervous laughter, crossing arms, or suddenly checking their phone are all possible clues. The language changes too—people use vague words, short replies, or answer a question with a question. You might even notice a sudden enthusiasm for a new topic that distracts from the original one.
Subjects often dodged include money, politics, trauma, health issues, sex, and anything personal that reveals vulnerability or past pain. Some people avoid talking about death, others skip over religion, or anything that might stir conflict. Often, it’s not the topic itself, but the emotional baggage tied to it that leads to silence.
So, do we push them to talk, or leave it be? That depends. If trust is strong and the setting feels safe, a gentle nudge can open doors. But if the conversation is strained or the person clearly retreats, respect the boundary. Sometimes silence is self-protection, not rudeness.
Not all silence needs filling. Some stories arrive when they’re ready to be told. Forcing them out might damage the relationship. Being patient, observant, and kind speaks louder than words ever could. And when someone finally does open up, you’ll be glad you waited.
-Michael (Author of SEETHINGS, downloadable and free for a limited time).
Discover more from Michael Forman – Author of Dark Fiction & Drama
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