It doesn’t need to be a secret. It didn’t happen anyway, so it’s okay! Trust me, it never happened! I figure if I say it three times, what I didn’t do will go away, forever. It’ll undo what I never did.
Well, I mean, it kind of happened. What the hell. Okay, it happened. We made love. We actually did it and it was wonderful. I’m ashamed, but I’m happy and disappointed. I hate this. It wasn’t supposed to happen. I never encouraged it, so actually, it shouldn’t have occurred at all — but I didn’t discourage it either. I think I wanted it.
Does that make me a bad person?
I’m not evil! I mean, I never planned to do that! It’s not like I wanted to slip into bed with someone who isn’t my spouse. I’ve never done anything like that before! I’m better than that! Believe me, I’m not an evil individual, just a weak one — and, terribly lonely.
It really happened. Yes. I suppose it did.
Perhaps I needed this. It’s been a while. It started with an innocent kiss and came with a that look of expectation I’ve not experienced in a long time — then I was pulled into the rest of it. Those touches took me away from all those things I’ve believed in. It was deliciously gorgeous!
But I hate myself.
What the hell happened?
This is not me.
So, I won’t say anything. If I don’t talk about it, then it didn’t happen, and I can get on living my life. Oh, but I still think can still taste my lover on my lips, the smell of passion on my skin. When I close my eyes. I can feel… ummm.
It didn’t happen!
Secret affairs do happen, and one of the steamiest ones is written into my novel SEETHINGS.
A cold, loveless marriage drives it — and it has devastating effects, to say nothing of poor mental health and stress for the individuals involved. Yes, some affairs are the results of accidents. Nina De Jong never planned to have an affair. She’d come out of a disastrous marriage and, quite frankly, hated him for it. At least, that’s what she told her friends — to cover what she really felt.
Mitchell Felding only wanted his wife to become more than just a good friend. She told everyone they were working on making a child, but that wasn’t true. Samantha was repulsed by sex. She hated talking about it. God was going to give them a child, not frivolous lovemaking. Mitchell just smiled and maintained a facade — to cover what he really felt.
The challenge in writing a novel about adults who have secret affairs is partly about developing good, strong characters and providing some quality backstory to their lots. Some internal conflict helps too, so we know how it feels for them to experience adultery for the first time. The other part is for them to enjoy delicious steam when they finally make their connection.
There is one other side I like to include.
Reasons for lovers to engage in extramarital relationships matters much to me. I feel each character I write into a story has to give readers an understanding of how difficult it can be for well-intended individuals to cross over and break their own rules. If what happens underneath the sheets is to be labelled as an accident, then every breakage that supports it must be justifiable. That doesn’t make what they do right, just understandable. The higher their standards, the greater the damages that follow.
Good people make mistakes too — to cover what they really feel, and what they desperately need.
“Forman’s writing style is artful, with the protagonist Mitchell’s warped thought processes masterfully exposed. The author has a powerful and vivid command of language and his word pictures are stark and disturbingly real.”– Linda J Bettenay, author of ‘Secrets Mothers Keep’ and ‘Wishes For Starlight’.