Bio
Name: Michael Forman
Born: Sydney, Australia
Age: 57
Lived: Brisbane, Queensland
Lives: Mandurah, W.A
Book Site: SMASHWORDS
Podcast: Spotify
Interests: Writing, Photography, Acting, Tennis, Karaoke.
Michael began writing copy for newspapers in the early ’90s.
“As a photographer with a growing collection of travel photographs, I began writing copy to get them published. I sold my first feature story to a major Australian newspaper in 1994. Since then, my written and photographed work has been published in Australia, the United Kingdom, and New Zealand.” -Michael Forman
Michael is the recipient of a diploma: Photography with Journalism.
SEETHINGS became an entirely new writing project — one that didn’t require photographs at all. It became a novel. Actually, it became a series.
“I was itching to expand my creative horizons by using words to make pictures, not film.” -Michael Forman
SEETHINGS and SEETHINGS 2 are the first two books of a pseudo-autobiographical trilogy — a darker look at love, marriage, sex and photography. It’s about a photographer who’s eager to shoot the perfect thunderstorm but ends up participating in a storm of another kind. (excerpts here)
The narrative places the reader inside a living room where an attack on a couple is taking place and it’s happening during a thunderstorm. Next, a body is found by a morning jogger and it’s hanging from a cliff. At first, these patterns of events are loosely connected until they line up and reveal an explosive ending. It’s sure to horrify the tender-hearted.
If I could leave you, dear reader, with a tiny clue — not everything a photographer wants to understand about pictures comes from the front of a lens. Sometimes, the answers they’re seeking are found deep inside themselves. All I can say is, thank God the truth remains hidden and all that’s left is to criticise an image’s composition. The rest is far too dangerous to disturb.
Get ready for twists that will bend your senses!
Tags Used Throughout This Site:
Mental Health Reading Relationships Stories Technology Travel Writing
Hi Micheal just found your insightful podcast, I have been with the same partner for nearly 28 years married for 23 years and based on the definition of a sexless marriage of sex less than 10 times a year I’ve been sexless for 25 years. I can fully relate to everything you talk about.
Regards
Hi Cam. Thanks for writing.
It’s a headspin, that’s for sure. I found it a battle to remain calm and objective, while maintaining a ‘nice’ facade. I don’t know how you’ve managed to continue to do it for so long.
-Michael
You are welcome to contact me if you need any further input
I heard “Elissa” relate her agonizing experience with her indifferent husband today.
It sounds as though she’s still coping with that relationship and it also sounds as though she feels you and she are unusual.
The common estimate I hear is that 20% of marriages are sexless. Perhaps she could benefit from a support group of people also in sexless marriages and those who used to be and no longer are?
Could I ask you to pass along the forum ILIASM.org? (I Live In A Sexless Marriage) So many people show up there sounding a lot like she did and find a path forward. Maybe have a look and if you agree it could help, send her an email?
It’s free of charge to participate; not even a “premium membership”. Just sexless and formerly sexless people helping each other out.
Dear Mr. Forman,
Should you find it helpful to guide your listeners to ILIASM.org, the acronym is “I Live In A Sexless Marriage” – ILIASM. Likely easier to remember if you’re driving while listening.
A question, is their an audiobook version of Seethings?
Willing to ask these questions another way if it’s too much space on your comments section, but I don’t see a contact method… I’d have messaged you at ILIASM, but I didn’t know when you might visit again. Apologies. Happy to use whatever protocol works best.
Hi. Here is fine. (I check this space more often)
I’ll mention the forum again in an upcoming podcast and how the letters relate to it’s address.
Seethings isn’t currently available as an audio book but I’m working on getting it done soon!
-Michael
I listened to the vocabulary episode today.
If you ever do a follow-up, ILIASM has a glossary with more terms you might be interested in sharing:
https://iliasm.org/thread/10/glossary-abbreviations
Some of them are rather fun portmanteaus/puns.
In your “Shallow” episode, you misread my name. It’s MirrorOrchid, rather than MirrorChild. You’re not the first, won’t be the last.
Amen to the fruitcake, TV, camping, boating, and fishing marriage. It’s what I offered Mrs. MirrorOrchid a bit over three years ago.
Mirror child? Really?
Wow. That one slipped through the cracks. Sorry. It must’ve been the small print I was working with on the day.
I’ll get back to that link for a future episode. Thanks.
Let them eat cake.
-M
Fantasy. Had to block him so I would not dream of pleasure w no pleasure. Mainly because I got tired of explaining my sexless experience.
I know that feeling! -M
An ILIASM post about the term “Incel” inspired by your podcast episode “Incel or Sexless Marriage?”:
https://iliasm.org/post/147371/thread
Coining the phrase “Non-concel”
I’ll have a look.
Non-concel? Very good. I hope it sticks! -M
Hi Michael, found your podcast whilst looking up sexless marriage. I am the woman who is with-holding sex. Have you ever discussed medical issues that could be the reason for a sexless marriage? Such as, vaginal atrophy, vaginismas, menopausal dryness, sexual trauma, lowered hormones that take sexual drive away…these make sex excruciating. It’s really hard on the woman when it’s this painful & feels like knives stabbing your vaginal wall. No amount of foreplay and lubricant can grow back a think & wet vaginal wall from like a young 20s & 30s. When marriage is agreed upon, it is in sickness & health so divorce is not an option when this is medical. I know this isn’t everyone’s case, but it is mine. I have 3 medical diagnosis including vaginal scarring from childbirth (severe tear…I had 3 9 lb babies that tore my vagina in half). Maybe you could mention in your podcasts that there are medical situations that cause sex problems even with men too. I couldn’t find an email so I’m posting here. Thank you!
Hi J!
Yes, pain during sex is a matter that needs addressing on the podcast again. Men AND women can and do experience pain, but few are willing to speak up because they don’t know if it’s normal.
I’ve spoken on pain and sex on earlier episodes, but I need to update it with a new one.
Thank you for reminding me that I need to revisit the topic. Would you mind if I use your story as an example in an upcoming one?
-M
Yes please do! A few more details maybe help you present this better. I had no pain from intercourse before child birth or menopause- so it makes this more frustrating for both of us. The first 2 children born tore me but I healed. It was after the 3rd child that I took vet long to heal from 2 tears. Then after hormone changes & breast feeding caused vaginal atrophy & external micro tears from dryness. I was told this would all resolve after breast feeding & post partum, but it didn’t. Having my 3rd child at age 38 sent me into early menopause. The pain from intercourse caused me to have moderate vaginismas where the internal muscles lock in place from trauma. I tried hormonal replacement, vaginal estrogen, lubricants, counseling, and more! By 44, I had to have a hysterectomy from fibroids & anemia from Loss of blood which has created yet another internal scar. The only thing I haven’t tried is pelvic floor therapy & a device called “Mona Lisa” that sends electrical waves to damage the vaginal walls so it can grow new skin. I’ve heard it’s painful. I’m doing the pelvic therapy to give it one last go. For your listeners, a supplement called “slippery elm” can be taken to cause wetness at any age & suppositories can help too. They work, but for me it’s much more complicated.