Judge. Jury. Executioner. The ‘bird’ is perfect Law. It gives us the power to be everything at once — and it feels so virtuous to deliver proper justice to shitty people without having to consult with anyone else or get permission to get it.
Think about it. When a flip takes place, we’ve already decided that a crime took place. It didn’t require a third party’s opinion to establish guilt. Within a justifiable moment later, our villain has been identified and sentenced. It’s immediate. Nice. Sweet. It can’t get better than that.
But make no mistake, this short, seemingly brief but harmless performance, isn’t just a knee-jerk, thoughtless act of immaturity. Our flip is a complete justice system compressed into a portable, on-site unit. Whenever there’s a crime committed near us, its judgement is quick to deploy. Most of us are unaware that it’s a violent replay of ancient justice — even mimicking the action that once accompanied it. When the longest digit is extended upwards and then thrust in that fashion, it’s like a knife being jabbed towards an enemy’s body. That blade is held by our distant ancestor — eye-for-eye retaliation. It could’ve easily been a dagger, a sword or a sharpened stick. They’re all the same when it comes to our Beast’s Law.
Criminal Law is painfully slow. White-hot payback is cooled to some hearings, affidavits and financial remuneration (or jail time). It can take years to get satisfaction. And when it finally gets to sentencing someone for a crime, its results can be unfulfilling. Sometimes, the offender walks free. That’s unsatisfying. But bird flips aren’t like that. They’re swift. Nobody escapes them. They’re immediate. Thank God they’re harmless. A finger won’t draw blood, but the anger that raised its tip is real. Its intention comes from violent thoughts. Something dark drives that weapon. Evil is inside us. Oh, yes, it is.
So the next time you flip someone, think about the passion behind what made your finger gesture occur, its ancient origin and the necessity for Criminal Law to keep real knives out of the hands of the uncivilised creature that dwells deep within our DNA.
If finger flipping is still unsatisfying, there’s always SEETHINGS for some comfort. Here you can see just how deep that inner darkness goes. We can take the journey together. I promise you, we’re more evil than you ever thought! Here, hold my hand.
Five women’s bodies are discovered after the nights of thunderstorms. Their spouses are suspected of the crimes, but it becomes clear that someone else is responsible. There’s no blood and few clues. A storm photographer specialising in taking lightning pictures may be the only witness.
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